Music Is The Weapon Against Life As A Symptom

I kid you not. I think it’s because I don’t write anymore, so all that creative spills over into my dreams, into dance, and into every other part of my life. I literally write scripts in my head of how I’d like conversations to go, sometimes.

Yeah, I’m weird. 

Whether it’s friendships breaking up (situations where I’m friends with the people who are no longer friends), family issues, sibling problems, whatever. I always blame myself. It kind of goes along with that need to fix everyone’s problems and make everything better. I shoulder a lot of the weight of people’s problems, which is bad, but I care too much to not do so. :/

I adore the way they talk about their music, and explain their vision. It’s the most beautiful thing in the entire world, to be so passionate about something you’ve more or less given life to. Jared Leto is a prime example of a passionate, articulate musician, as well as Alex Deleon from The Cab and Gerard Way of MCR (in my opinion).

I literally could watch Jared talk about Mars’ music for hours.

I’ve only had two boyfriends, and neither were in love with me.

I don’t know how it feels to have a person take care of you.

I don’t know what it feels like to be someone that your siignificant other looks forward to seeing.

I don’t know what it’s like to be told that I am the best thing in someone’s life.

Which is probably why I don’t really like romance movies.

I’ve never had it, so I don’t want it. It just seems weird for anyone to care about me like that.

Especially when I personally don’t feel worth that kind of love from a significant other.

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That’s my own personal quote. Mainly because I’ve heard “time heals all wounds” all my life and have wanted to smack the person who came up with it.

Time does heal all wounds, true, but it doesn’t forget them.

Just like a scar from a cut or surgery, it’s always there.

And even when that mark is gone, the memory is there.

Time heals everything but the memory.

Musicians delve into complicated aspects of life and love and being through their music, painters portray it in their artwork, architects in their blueprints, guitarists and drummers through the way they play, fiction writers through the worlds they create, etc.

Everyone conveys their outlook and thoughts on life in a variety of ways. It can affect you, in my opinion, as long as you stop, look, and listen.

My whole family is talented in that era, not to brag, so I’ve grown up around it.

And once you get me started, I end up making a four course meal.

Every time. I freaking adore cooking. It’s like painting, but with food.

Really easily. It’s ridiculous. Which is why I try to stay off social media when that happens. But right now I’m annoyed with my study guide so that’s not happening.

But I will go through hell and highwater for concert tickets.